is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
