i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
