You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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