i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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