Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.