week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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