I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize