This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
