Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
