I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Operation Purity has been aborted
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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