doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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