Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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