I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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