Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
