I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize