that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
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