just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
