Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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