we should wear snuggies to the strip club
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
