Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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