Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
