Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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