idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
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I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
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i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
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