Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize