last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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