I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize