come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
