he wants to bone in the snuggie
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Randomize
