Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
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You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
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I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
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