even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
