I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
