i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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