Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level. http://tfl.nu/ek4x
  Replies (2) Good night (1732) Bad night (567)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial http://tfl.nu/135m
  Replies (7) Good night (1416) Bad night (1011)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704 ): I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is http://tfl.nu/z1kt
  Replies (109) Good night (13549) Bad night (2119)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule. http://tfl.nu/z55h
  Replies (25) Good night (3956) Bad night (1073)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding. http://tfl.nu/82eq
  Replies (10) Good night (4486) Bad night (760)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself. http://tfl.nu/imt6
  Replies (8) Good night (4737) Bad night (1454)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969.. http://tfl.nu/r5nl
  Replies (18) Good night (1745) Bad night (4306)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle. http://tfl.nu/lk8z
  Replies (25) Good night (6041) Bad night (1325)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama. http://tfl.nu/jhww
  Replies (4) Good night (1234) Bad night (1094)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I told you those kegels would come in handy one day

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina (401): I told you those kegels would come in handy one day http://tfl.nu/ed4f
  Replies (22) Good night (2473) Bad night (698)
• Favorite

  (+31): View more from The Netherlands

  So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+31): So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it? http://tfl.nu/5fmg
  Replies (7) Good night (1785) Bad night (528)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me http://tfl.nu/el5y
  Replies (3) Good night (1095) Bad night (348)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  Are you okay?

  (1-661): View more from California

  I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): Are you okay? (1-661): I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay! http://tfl.nu/70id
  Replies (1) Good night (440) Bad night (516)
• Favorite

  (279): View more from

  Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (279): Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self. http://tfl.nu/wxz9
  Replies (1) Good night (549) Bad night (244)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there http://tfl.nu/ouz3
  Replies (7) Good night (364) Bad night (519)

Randomize