No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
YAS. BRING CRAB.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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