break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize