SEEEEXXX PLEASE
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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