I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I'm at about main and main street
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize