But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
