Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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