Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
