i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
