We're like a lot better than the average bears
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.