dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure