I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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