when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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