Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i may or may not be watching the land before time
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
