Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(520): View more from Arizona

JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!

(1-520): View more from Arizona

what?

(520): View more from Arizona

YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!

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(520): JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP! (1-520): what? (520): YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?! http://tfl.nu/3cop

Replies (38) Good night (911) Bad night (4218)
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(972): View more from Texas

Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"

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(972): Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88" http://tfl.nu/q0w3

Replies (58) Good night (4929) Bad night (790)
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(817): View more from Texas

After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.

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(817): After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot. http://tfl.nu/l939

Replies (63) Good night (895) Bad night (8405)
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(847): View more from Illinois

Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.

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(847): Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot. http://tfl.nu/nyh6

Replies (41) Good night (4703) Bad night (1063)
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(972): View more from Texas

You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"

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(972): You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry" http://tfl.nu/fk1l

Replies (21) Good night (11752) Bad night (1070)
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(703): View more from Virginia

look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys

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(703): look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys http://tfl.nu/ae48

Replies (22) Good night (6869) Bad night (1233)
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(219): View more from Indiana

U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"

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(219): U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus" http://tfl.nu/8y4p

Replies (12) Good night (3997) Bad night (988)
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(502): View more from Kentucky

She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....

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(502): She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage.... http://tfl.nu/ha8c

Replies (6) Good night (2931) Bad night (1289)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."

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(412): It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus." http://tfl.nu/ftkz

Replies (4) Good night (2314) Bad night (805)
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.

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(717): Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment. http://tfl.nu/vmb7

Replies (2) Good night (1542) Bad night (941)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.

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(412): This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him. http://tfl.nu/rlpz

Replies (6) Good night (1456) Bad night (660)
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(406): View more from Montana

You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.

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(406): You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him. http://tfl.nu/veeu

Replies (12) Good night (689) Bad night (1291)
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(817): View more from Texas

Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!

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(817): Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude! http://tfl.nu/8kar

Replies (3) Good night (973) Bad night (589)
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(585): View more from New York

You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start

(585): View more from New York

Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...

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(585): You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start (585): Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea... http://tfl.nu/3df9

Replies (2) Good night (570) Bad night (360)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro

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(603): She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro http://tfl.nu/2exh

Replies (0) Good night (562) Bad night (166)

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