Texts From Last Night

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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.

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  (978): I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud. http://tfl.nu/nbnf
  Replies (15) Good night (1494) Bad night (472)
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  (916): View more from California

  i think i have herpe

  (1-916): View more from California

  just one?

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  (916): i think i have herpe (1-916): just one? http://tfl.nu/e1l6
  Replies (32) Good night (1171) Bad night (4600)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.

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  (732): Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend. http://tfl.nu/3lzx
  Replies (20) Good night (1003) Bad night (4258)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...

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  (803): For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer... http://tfl.nu/txcz
  Replies (20) Good night (4503) Bad night (893)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  He felt like a one man threesome

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  (303): He felt like a one man threesome http://tfl.nu/1ehs
  Replies (17) Good night (9110) Bad night (951)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.

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  (202): the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine. http://tfl.nu/yvwg
  Replies (15) Good night (1154) Bad night (5372)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .

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  (913): You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" . http://tfl.nu/nj3u
  Replies (1) Good night (1999) Bad night (1106)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists

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  (720): I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists http://tfl.nu/iudi
  Replies (25) Good night (5714) Bad night (948)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.

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  (302): Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing. http://tfl.nu/c56c
  Replies (2) Good night (937) Bad night (1135)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"

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  (817): Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent" http://tfl.nu/6trp
  Replies (6) Good night (1309) Bad night (2676)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm

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  (314): Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm http://tfl.nu/9ca7
  Replies (9) Good night (486) Bad night (1364)
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  (980): View more from North Carolina

  You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Haha hell yea

  (980): View more from North Carolina

  Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.

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  (980): You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday. (336): Haha hell yea (980): Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday. http://tfl.nu/pa5o
  Replies (2) Good night (988) Bad night (345)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.

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  (218): I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over. http://tfl.nu/5car
  Replies (4) Good night (1499) Bad night (310)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer

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  (770): possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer http://tfl.nu/bt81
  Replies (0) Good night (314) Bad night (457)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.

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  (740): I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas. http://tfl.nu/p3js
  Replies (4) Good night (485) Bad night (240)

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