If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
