Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
How external is "for external use only"?
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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