the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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