lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize