from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
